10 August 2012

Untitled Time Travel Movie

So I had a brilliant idea for a time travel comedy.  A middle-aged farmer, wasting his life in North Korea but wanting to impress his great leader, decides to build a time machine.  Certainly with a time machine the Great Leader will take over the world proper and reward the farmer with riches, freedom, and maybe some food.

As this is North Korea, and he is but a farmer, the man has NO idea what he's doing and has very limited supplies.  In the end, it's nothing more than a wooden crate with some chicken wire and various other farming implements scattered about.  One dark and stormy night he decides to give his machine a go.  He gets in, hand cranks the small light bulb thinking it's powering a great machine, sets the dial, and throws the switch.  At the same time, a bolt of lightning strikes his box, knocking him unconscious.  The heavy rains carry the sealed wooden box down the slop and into the sea.

Two days later it washes up on the shore of North Korea.  Some guy on his holiday finds the box and cracks it open.  Seeing the poor gent inside, the worst for wears, and assuming he's seeking asylum he rushes him to a hospital and claims he's his brother, just in case the North Koreans send some posting about the guy.

The farmer wakes up in the modern hospital and is awe struck.  Such technology!  It's so clean!  The city outside is full of lights and amazing machines!  It is made quite clear that he has, in fact, traveled to the future.  The rest of the movie is about the farmer exploring modern-day South Korea and trying to find his "time-machine."  The South Korean spends the movie getting him out of trouble and trying to convince him that, no, it is the year 2012 and there's no such thing as time travel.

I haven't figured out the ending yet but there we go.  Brilliant.

26 July 2012

Oh me.

Best... hand warmers... ever.

So by some suggestion I started watching an anime called Sekirei. I'm about halfway through and it's another one of those silly harem/fan service animes where one guy is surrounded by attractive girls, all who want him. More so than most, this one lends itself so heavily to the hentai category that I'm really surprised they didn't just say "fuck it" and make it one anyway. Most of the girls are overly bouncy, end up naked or at least topless a large amount of the time, and our dear hero Minato must use his DNA to activate the girls' powers. This DNA exchange happens through a kiss. Okay, innocent enough, but come on!

So, here's me and my dirty brain going... well hell, if they're not going to do it, I am. So for the past few days I've jotted down a concept similar to Sekirei, created new characters, and trying to figure in a plot of some sort. I, unlike this anime, will cross the line that begs to be crossed. Often. Messily. It'll be great fun.

I won't post it here, I like keeping this blog somewhat clean despite the absolute toxic waste dump my brain is. I may provide a link, however, should it ever actually get started. For those of you who have seen it, I'd welcome ideas or thoughts. I'm going to wager that I won't see anything from anyone as I doubt anyone reads this blog but the offer is still there. Cheers.

16 March 2012

The Most Dangerous Wap

I've come to the conclusion that the most dangerous thing that I could ever acquire would be invulnerability. The reason for this would be forcing people do deal with me and put up with my force of argument. Someone doing something I deem stupid? Smacks from a wiffle bat.

Many, many smacks from a wiffle bat. Until they decided to use their brain. And they'd have to, no other choice, because they couldn't make me go away. No amount of force or rage or artillery would stop me from smackin' with a wiffle bat. Imaging militant Islamists yelling for the death of some poor dude who tweeted that he wanted to learn from Islam but he wouldn't bow to it... having to deal with me hitting them time and again with a wiffle bat, unable to blow me up or behead me.

I would have entirely too much fun and, in the end, think I could win a Nobel Peace Prize. Too bad invulnerability is way more difficult to achieve.

Gameplay Revolution in MMOs

Someone had mentioned that Shadowrun would make an excellent MMO.  I agree.  I also think that most RPG systems out there could be made into...